Is my pain so unreal? What. They only care if I’m bleeding internally. So I’m not bleeding in my stomach and they want to send me home. What about my intestines? You mean it’s ok to bleed there then? All they want is to cut people up.

From Thursday evening in the Emergency Department till Saturday evening in the ward, I can count the medications they gave me with 2 hands.

My pain score is a 6. And from someone who has a painful chronic disease, it should ring some alarm bells. All they gave me was 2 tabs of Anarex. It didn’t help that it was so fucking cold, and they were running fast 2 pints of COLD normal saline. I think they don’t have the brains to know that the coldness gives people like me more pain.

I asked for 10mg of amitriptyline in the ED. I was shagged and in terrible pain, but was entirely sleepless. Fair enough, they acceded to my request. But I was still sleepless because I was in excruciating pain.

In the ward, I repeatedly asked for analgesia. I was ignored again and again because I was in the care of the General Surgery team. I had to have a pint of blood infused. I asked again for analgesia. The nice MO gave in. I told her I’ve had pethidine(meperidine) before and had no problems. So I got my IM shot of pethidine and metoclopramide. They transfused me, and my BP dropped. My chest felt tight. But I was groggy from the pethidine to even tell them anything. More discomfort.

The transfusion went fine after they managed to bring my BP up. But I was still in pain. Pethidine did little, I later found out, and my pain score hovered around 4. They had to poke me some 3-4 times just to get the lilac EDTA tube filled for my FBC. And that added on to the pain- you should’ve seen the way they took my blood. It was APPALLING.

Morning came and I was seen by the Gen-Surg team. They pushed for an OGD. I asked for painkillers, but I was ignored yet again. I finally asked, albeit a little embarrassed, for steroids shots to my shoulders. I knew that question would make them call my rheumy.

No painkillers after the pethidine shot. I fasted for 14 hours for my scope. That was unnecessarily long. Moreover, the last morsel of food I had was on Thursday 6am. And I would go on to starve for 48 hours, being allowed only clear liquids.

I was scoped. They must’ve given me fentanyl for the sedation. For I was knocked out, and had nightmares when I was KO-ed. My hard palate was sore. I vaguely remember the disgusting feeling of tubes down into my stomach. Absolutely uncomfortable.

I rested and secretly hoped that my rheumy would pay me a visit. She did come, with a registrar and MO whom I’ve seen in the ward where I was working. You have no idea how happy and elated I was when I saw her.

They discussed and deliberated. They were pushing for a colonoscopy to exclude NSAID-induced colitis. She told them briefly about me. I asked again for analgesia. They could only suggest Panadeine. And if that fails, triamcinolone intra-muscularly or intra-articularly.

Then my rheumy told my mum the cold hard facts about me and my RA. My mum told her to do her best for me. I wanted to slap her with the fact that w both my rheumy and I have been trying our best. It was she herself and dad who have been taking the laissez-faire approach.

Then came the melodrama- all the grievances, all the tears, and the raised voices.

And I still didn’t have my analgesia. I only got my pathetic 2 pills of Panadeine at about 10pm. That’s about 20 hours after my pethidine shot.

I learnt that there was absolutely NOTHING on my IMR except for the Panadeine, the intravenous esomeprazole(Nexium) and the premixed IV that I was having. Not even the tetracycline ointment that the ED doctor suggested.

And so I made noise, only short of making a ruckus. Then the ointment finally came.

It’s 72 hours since I presented to the ED. All I had were 2 tabs of Anarex, 1 shot of pethidine and metoclopramide, 6 tabs of Panadeine, and 4 bolus doses of Nexium.

That is all. I’m still in pain. I’m not given my anti-depressants, nor my RA medications, or anything else for that matter.

I asked the nurse to request for the MO to order a shot of triamcinolone. I was told coldly, that it was KIV suggestion, that they’ll not give it to me.


This is exactly how I do not want to be treated as a patient. I am being dismissed and ignored, my pain poorly controlled in a place where there’s a multitude of alternatives for pain relief.

Unacceptable. Seriously unacceptable.

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