Dear Nina

You’ve gotten too comfortable having taken over, and it’s been a while hasn’t it? It’s time for me take over and regain that control once more.  It’s time to overshadow you and push you into the background. And i shall have you stay there until you’re clean forgotten.

How about that? Deal?

Why of course! You’d turn me down flat, and you won’t give up without a fight. In fact i know you’re going to do your darndest to retain your control over me, just like what you’ve been doing each and every single day since the day you took over all means of control from me.

All these time you’ve been around, you’ve rendered me completely incapacitated. I had no voice nor words to speak up for myself, no thoughts of my own to challenge you, no motivation to fight against you, and without a hand to help myself. I was both hopeless and helpless with you around. You’d think that i’ll gladly let you be, but no. Why should i? You’ve grown all too comfortable, while i am being taken hostage by you.

You, Nina, are the perpetrator.

Aren’t you tired? You are still whispering into my ear, feeding my mind with distorted truths, your voice so soft, yet so low and harsh with malice… I know what those words mean, Nina. But you are telling me that well-meaning people are demeaning me. You are telling me that those well-intentioned words are full of deceit and lies. Even i am tired of hearing your voice, because listening to you speak is in and by itself very energy-sapping and exhausting. I wish you knew how much i’ve always wanted to shut you up.

Can’t you see Nina, that everybody hates you? You must’ve noticed the increasing challenges and confrontations, and your voice being drowned out. You of course, don’t care and cannot be bothered. But i hope you know Nina, that you are being taken down slowly. You’re going to be insignificant. I’m sure you are going to ask me if i hate you, but i won’t give you my answer because i know you are going to use it against me anyway, to keep me hostage for as long as you can. I won’t let you.

I will be in the light casting that shadow on you, Nina. You will be in the darkness, and you belong there. Being ever so overbearing though, i know you’d fight back and speak to me with conviction, that you are my friend and that you don’t deserve to be in the backseat. But you are not, Nina. You are not my friend.

You’re pretty much done here, and you’ve gotta go.

Steph

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