I thought needed to fight a war just getting her to accept my resignation letter- I’d heard she had recently rejected not once but twice, a colleague’s. And after all the brouhaha, I didn’t want to fight for the sake of it.
She must have saw it coming. I dropped hints to my senior on Saturday. “Here’s my resignation” as I handed my envelope which had failed to seal, to her. No shock, no surprise. Beyond that, no decency to even read what was on my letter. She just pulled the letter out of the envelope, looked front and back, and stopped there. *pfft*
And so, just like that, i submitted my 2nd resignation of the year 2014. It is also my 2nd in my whole life, and I’m not proud of that.
I don’t care what people tell me- they are secondary to my own thoughts and actions and i pay little heed to them, honestly. I know what i have to do, and I’m glad i handed in my letter.
It’s exceedingly difficult in my recovery, to hear things like “you have not put in any effort”, when all all I’ve been doing is to give my fucking darndest to the point i run on fear fuel. I’ve gotten my pride stepped and trampled on, all for what? The greater cause of medicine? *spits* The saddest thing, no!
And I’ve had my own gripes since I started- basic things like patient safety, medication knowledge, our own safety, policies and procedures etc. I’ve known by now. 7 years in the making, they’re not changing despite my voicing out. I’ve tried. I’ll let them be.
So yeah. I’m leaving, again.